Saturday, October 18, 2014

I was without Internet all day yesterday.

After three hours, I called Comcrap myself, and reported an outage.

Me: I want to report an Internet outage.
Comcast drone: My screen does not show an Internet outage in your area. Only a TV outage.
Me: I do not have a cable outage, I have an Internet outage. I'm reporting it.
Comcast drone: Have you tried shutting down your modem and restarting your computer?
Me: I'm telling you that my modem was working fine at 9 AM, and then it stopped. It's an Internet outage. Not my modem
Comcast drone: I don't see any Internet outage on my system.
Me: I KNOW YOU -- I know, because I am the first one reporting it. Please enter that into your system.
Comcast drone: Your modem is out of date. You need to lease our new modem that --
Me: IT IS NOT ABOUT MY MODEM! MY MODEM -- My modem is working fine. I am reporting an Internet outage.
Comcast drone: I see no Internet outage on my screen. Can I suggest that, as a long-term valuable Comcast customer, you choose our Infinty pagackage?
Me: LOG MY GODDAMNED INTERNET OUTAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comcast drone: There is no Internet outage in your area.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I reported the outage again three hours later. Again, I got nothing but a runaround.

Comcrap briefly gave me Internet service at 6 PM, but it went out again shortly thereafter.

I can't wait to move out of D.C. and to a place that doesn't use Comcrap.

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